How to Shush Someone
I often find myself in audience settings—such as a theater, concert, class or worship service—with chatty neighbors whose whispered (or loud) conversations disturb the peace of everyone around them.
Crucial Conversations for Accountability Posts
What to Do When Your Employee Fails to Perform and Continually Complains
One of my employees keeps complaining about her high workload. I have done everything I can to reduce her workload—hired additional staff, cut back her projects, and so on. Despite all this, she still logs overtime hours. She must give 120% when 80% would be sufficient.
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
Parenting
How Can I Get My Adult Child to Move Out?
My daughter moved back in with us over a year ago. She said she needed to stay one month. Nineteen have now passed. We want her to move out but can’t get her to. The pandemic has made things difficult. She refuses to get a real job. She refuses to clean up. She recently got her stimulus check and didn’t offer us anything. She is very disrespectful and now our granddaughter is mimicking her. How do I stop this toxic relationship we are in? What can we do?
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
When Your Supervisor Goes Back on Their Word
A little over a year ago I was promoted at work and presented with two options, one of which entailed leading a scientific program that I had spent more than two years developing with my supervisor. I declined the other choice because of the opportunity to lead this exciting new program.
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
What to Do When Employees Don’t Respond to Feedback
I have an employee who just won’t engage with feedback. When I do share feedback, he totally falls apart and wants to quit. He struggles with any type of criticism from me or anyone. Other managers have shared with me the same concern. How can I get him to engage?
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
How to Manage Someone Resistant to Change
How can I get an employee I supervise who is resistant to change to become more flexible in the workplace? I have included him in discussions about workplace change and have asked him for ideas on how we can improve workflows to support our mission and goals, but he offers no ideas or suggestions.
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
Performance Management Tips for Coaching High Performers
I have an outstanding employee who has asked me to mentor him. He sees me as an example of the kind of leader he would like to become, and he would like to travel a career path similar to my own. I’m flattered, and yet I’m unsure how to help him. He’s incredibly competent already and I don’t want to agree to mentor him and then shortchange him. What can I do?
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
How to Make it Safe to Deliver Feedback
I have a staff member who is diagnosed with depression and anxiety. She also has a very low sense of self-esteem. Giving her constructive feedback on her performance is painful—for both of us. I have a hard time helping her feel safe when she seems to only focus on the negative stuff. How can I establish a sense of safety and keep her from going into survival mode?
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
When You’re Bored in One-on-Ones with Employees
I have an employee who tends to talk a lot and drift off topic in our one-on-one meetings, to the point where I can’t focus. I have tried to keep them on track, but it is very difficult. They often take up an hour instead of the scheduled 30 minutes, and I completely lose track of what they are saying. I try hard not to look bored, but I’m concerned that I’m getting distracted because I’m bored. Please help.
Crucial Conversations for Accountability
accountability
Lessons in Accountability, Police Culture, and Social Change
Dear Joseph, In the opinion article “Accountability is a Key to Changing Police Culture,” you outline many of the issues of police culture that are ingrained in the fabric of law enforcement. You refer to the “warrior mentality” culture in some police departments as well as the demand placed on police to address societal issues …