Dear Crucial Skills, Recently, my teenage daughter got her first “real” job as a dog washer at a pet store. She has been deliriously happy with the job and has worked very conscientiously at it (as far as I can tell). However, last weekend, she was reprimanded by her manager. A customer complained about two …

Dear Crucial Skills, Why is direct talk bad? I’m not talking about rudeness or offering my opinion. I’m talking about saying things without adding “cushioning” words. It’s not well received when we speak directly and to the point. This isn’t about passing judgment on someone and voicing those judgments. It’s about getting work done. A …

Dear Crucial Skills, I have read Crucial Conversations and greatly enjoyed it. However, I’m having difficulty knowing what to do with my mother-in-law when she makes snide remarks in group settings about me. We’ve had discussions before where she has blown up emotionally, and I don’t want to cause a scene. Do you have any …

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Ron McMillan is coauthor of four New York Times bestsellers, Change Anything, Crucial Conversations, Crucial Confrontations, and Influencer. READ MORE Dear Crucial Skills, I supervise a qualified employee with an attitude problem. She can easily do the work required of her and do it well—if she’s in the right mood. I have …

Dear Crucial Skills, What do you do when your supervisor moves a conversation into areas that you feel are none of your supervisor’s business? One day, my supervisor was looking at real estate online when I went into her office for a meeting. She joked about finding a house for me but then actually started …

Dear Crucial Skills, I was very surprised earlier this year to lose my job of 20 years as a registered nurse in a layoff. I had been repeatedly reassured that I would be safe earlier in the year. Is there anything I can be sure to bring up with a new employer to avoid this …

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Kerry Patterson is coauthor of four New York Times bestsellers, Change Anything, Crucial Conversations, Crucial Confrontations, and Influencer. READ MORE Dear Crucial Skills, I have a very direct and, you could say, brash way of talking. I have been told I talk like a New Yorker but I work in Salt Lake …

Dear Crucial Skills, Is it okay to admit you may not be ready to handle every crucial conversation? Recently, I had an incident that did not turn out well. An acquaintance approached me with a raised voice, inappropriate language and a pointed finger in a very public place. I immediately went to silence and could …

Dear Crucial Skills, What do you do about folks who absolutely refuse to take responsibility for their own behavior? One of my colleagues frequently behaves disrespectfully and even aggressively toward others—including myself. A number of us have spoken with him about his behavior. At times he’s defensive and denies the problem—but at other times he’ll …

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Joseph Grenny is coauthor of four New York Times bestsellers, Change Anything, Crucial Conversations, Crucial Confrontations, and Influencer. READ MORE Dear Crucial Skills, What do I do if a team member blames a family member for problems? We have someone who is on flex time to help with child care. A number …